How winterlady should answer her next phone call.

[jdotmi]

Caller: Hi. Um. I'm having problems with my program. It's not doing what I want it to do.
winterlady: RTFM!
Caller: Huh?
winterlady: Oh, sorry. Pavlov's Dog response.
Caller: Huh?
winterlady: ...

Comments

[winterlady.livejournal.com]

Long-standing tradition of trying to assist our very capable customers to realize the full potential of the software they use every day. It's our attempt, as store support, to help them to utilize all parts of their brain and the documentation provided to them. The documentation very often being fairly complete and, at the very least, mostly covering some issues that they may have questions about if they'd only look there first, rather than call us.

Or, as jdotmi put it, "read the fucking manual".